Give Me All Your Dough

(Ke)  Oroweat, stop pretending your freshness is being maintained by this plastic fortress rather than a gazillion preservatives and let me the hell in! I want a sandwich!

(Kr)  They are the moat and castle of the bread world.  

(Ke)  Is it trying to keep itself in or me out? You're bread! You're not doing yourself any favors by micromanaging my carb intake!

(Kr)  Well, it's accomplishing not being eaten. Which is what I'd do if I were bread. 

(Ke) I'm going to commission them to put a security system in my house.